I gotta comment: "people who need people..."

Random post.

The old expression was (I think) "people who need people are the happiest people in the world". If you look at the self-help literature nowadays, "people who need people" are viewed as dysfunctional. Well, this is my take.

No person can build himself up into a self-sufficient island. We are wired to want meaningful human contact. And even besides that..

At a VERY basic level: When I stop to go get my coffee in the morning, I'm hoping that the barista finds me tolerable enough so that she doesn't put arsenic into my coffee (I hear arsenic tastes like almond). Then when I go to work after that, I hope the boss likes me enough to keep letting me into the front door and allowing me to earn a paycheck that keeps a roof over my head. Then when I stop to get my car serviced at lunch on occasion, I hope the mechanics are decent enough to fix my car properly so I don't discover their errors by getting stranded on the highway in the 95-degree heat. Finally, when I stop at Whole Foods at the end of the day, I hope they find me respectable enough to actually let me into the door to buy my food.

So we care about how other people view us. I think it's perfectly natural to care (and not a sign of weakness), because on some level we are reliant on them for our survival. I suppose that if I were a lion, tiger, or bear and could just chase my food down and overpower it, I wouldn't be so dependent on the commerce system to allow me to just buy my meals. Not to mention that I wouldn't have to buy shelter and transportation. But well, I'm not, and so in the meanwhile...

I suppose some reading this are saying that I could learn to grow my own food, diagnose and fix my own car (that is becoming harder and harder as everything becomes run by more intricate electronics), and take my own medical care into my own hands. But how well would that really work. I'm not sure I'd be a decent farmer (I don't kill plants but I don't have a green thumb), mechanic (I'm decent with my hands but no doubt others are better), or doctor (I'm done with school!)

Someone can and ought to, first of all,  become more self-reliant. It's great to know how to cook, drive a stick, change a tire, and (thanks to strength training) be able to take care of myself physically. Someone can and ought to, secondly, develop skills that make his presence more valued by other people. Some skills are professional (someone is more valuable learning a new programming language), some are personal (someone's company is more desirable when they know how to really listen to others say). That I think is meaningful self-development.

I would say that the biggest thing one can strive for is a cause to fight for. If you think about all the people we admire, it is those who keep pushing for something great, even as they face critics. Something better for themselves or others. It doesn't have to be high-profile. It has to be something that gives you a sense of satisfaction, a sense of contribution.

We all love and admire passion. Why does everyone dig scars? What do you think they signify?